"You might be a Mom if..."

This blog is written in honor of our churches Moms & Munchkins (M&M's) group. Our feerless leader and my good friend Korby has been starting our sessions with "You might be a Mom if..." statements. It really helps us feel humbled and puts us all on the same page as Moms. Of course it also brings laughter! Here is my list. I hate to admit it, but all of these are written from personal experience!
You might be a Mom if...

1. You take your toddler with you to the ladies room at Target and while you are sitting on the "throne," she opens the stall door and runs out leaving you exposed to whoever is in the restroom.
2. You take your 2 toddlers with you into the dressing room at "Sweet Repeat" (a 2nd hand store) to try on a pair of jeans and besides them crawling out from underneath the door (which is a shower curtain help up with a shower curtain rod), they pull the curtain down, this time exposing you to whole store!
3. You are sitting quietly in church with your 4 year old son, trying to enjoy the service. After taking him to the bathroom twice already, he's asking to go again. You tell him that he can wait until church is over and continue to listen to the pastor's sermon. Just then your son finds his loudest voice and yells..."But I've gotta go poop!!!"
4. You go down to the hotel lobby with your 8 year old son to by some popcorn from the vending machines for a late night snack when you see a Ms. PacMan machine. Feeling nostalgic, you tell your son that the Ms. PacMan game came out when you were in Jr. High and you remember playing it at the neighborhood video game hang-out. Out of the blue, a man (who was totally flirting) makes a comment to you that, there's no way that could be true because you don't look a day over 25. Just then your loving son pipes up and says..."Huh! She's way older than that! She's 33!"
5. You're still wearing shoes you wore in college and your children all have a different pair of shoes for each outfit! (almost)
6. You consider taking a shower everyday is a luxury!
7. You can diaper and dress a baby, take your toddler potty, kiss a boo-boo, fix dinner, load the dishwasher, do the laundry...all while talking on the phone to your favorite friend without missing a beat!
8. You hear a song over the loudspeaker in the store and start singing and dancing to it with your toddler, not realizing that people are watching you and laughing...once you do realize it, you don't really care and keep singing and dancing anyway!
9. You finally make an appointment to have a massage with the gift certificate that your husband and children got for you for Mother's Day, 9 months ago. After the massage you are completely relaxed and satisfied, not to mention sleepy. As you're leaving the salon, you quickly glance in the mirror to see if you look o.k. You walk outside and decide that it would be a good idea not to drive the 20 minutes home until you've walked around a little bit to help yourself wake up before you get behind the wheel. So...you walk down the block to the 2nd hand store to do some shopping. After you're done shopping, chatting with the clerk and smiling at people walking by, you return to your vehicle to head home. Looking in the rear view mirror you spot someone looking at you with "raccoon eyes," tossled hair, and on the right side of their face there appears to be a "sleep line." All of a sudden you realize...it's you! Laughter fills the vehicle and you can hardly contain yourself as you realize that you just walked around town and did shopping looking like a drunk zombie...but at least you were relaxed because...who cares! You're a Mom and you deserve to have days like this!!! :)